In Need of an "Emma"

Jane Austen and all those Brontes seemed to believe that true love could be found by nary leaving your house...a house that was usually large and in a very rural location where few men would venture. But the men that did venture, they won the girls.
Here's a modern plan for me to meet a man without leaving my home:

1. From my 3rd floor front porch, lure passers-by a la girls in Amsterdam. Never mind that the typical passers-by are women and men with strollers and dogs and, most often, middle-aged lesbian couples.

2. Instead of making faces and grumpily leaping over the crevasses in my street made by construction men at 7 am, step outside and "accidentally" twist my ankle (the old damsel in distress ruse). The cigarette smoking townies will run to my aid.

Even Jane Eyre went to the market in town sometimes.

3. While picking up my farm share at the Coop, bump into a handsome, single, mid-30s aged man. My lettuce spills with his tomatoes and we decide to make a salad! We're married within the year.