Concert Review: She & Him

Andrea interviews Zara post late night concert.

So Zara, when you agreed to accompany me to see She & Him, did you know who they were? No, I did not. If your band is not playing on Magic 106.7 (Boston’s Continuous Soft Rock) then I do not know your band. Remind me again of your feelings for The Captain and Tennille....
I liked that you decided to reinstate the Fashion Showdown for this special occasion. What made you pick the dress you wore? Did you know Zooey was also going to wear a silver sparkle dress? Well, I am pretty sure you told me to wear the dress after our epic trip to the Natick Collection during which I searched high and low for just the right black cinch belt. After accusing you and the universe of conspiring to deny me the belt, you had no choice but to insist that I wear the damned belt with the silver dress. And yes, I did know what Zooey would be wearing. The demyelinating disease in my brain has created a wormhole that allows me to share fashion consciousness with celebrities.
We ate dinner at a new sushi restaurant before the show. Did you like what you ordered? I kind of felt like Derrick from P.F. Chang's would have made dinner a little more...awkward. What do you think? I did enjoy my dinner, but I wish I had ordered something other than my usual sushi standards. Basho intimidated me. I had never seen fois gras on a sushi menu. I did like that twice in one week we sat in large u-shaped booths and still managed to sit in awkward positions even though we had tables that would accommodate endless permutations of comfortable seating options. Derrick would have made dinner weird – his trademark “crouch” position is irritating.
I enjoyed hanging out at the West Elm and pretending it was our home. It reinforced my desire to have a maid. If you could buy one thing from the store, what would it be? I would buy one of those hairy pillows that reminded me of my sister's hair. Obviously, I would pick the faux bear skin rug that I wanted to use as prop for dirty photos. I don’t know why you wouldn’t let me pose for the camera?
Once we got into the show, it became immediately obvious we were surrounded by Russian Spies. I guess this isn't a question so much as a statement. But I think you have a special talent for identifying spies because whenever I interacted with one, you had an asthma attack. Indeed, it would appear that my sixteen year pack-a-day smoking habit has come back to bite me in the form of uncontrollable choking and wheezing in the presence of Eastern European espionage. Theory One: The Russians/Soviets only had access to cheap cigarettes for decades and they are jealous of my unlimited access to Camel Lights and have somehow poisoned me. Theory Two: The Russians are dusty. Unfortunately my wit was lost on the foreigners. I told the woman whose breasts were smooshed up against my back that if she got any closer I'd have to buy her a drink and she'd have to take me home. She didn't get it.
How many Anthropologie dresses were worn last night? Do you think it was more or less than the number of plaid shirts worn by men? Many, many Anthropologie dresses were worn. Far more than plaid shirts. I especially liked that we identified the dresses/skirts with such enthusiasm. Cat dress!!! OMG, she paid top dollar for that dress! I am waiting until it gets below $60 and then it's mine.
Do you think if we had waited around after the show we would have seen Zooey? And if so, do you think you could have convinced her to go home with you? Yes, and yes. Chicks dig me. Every since I got married, I have become remarkably in demand. Inevitably, people want what they can’t have. It’s human nature.
Thanks for coming with me to see She & Him last night! It was my pleasure! That is what identical cousins are for : )